Its been far too long between posts about my mother. I'm suffering high-drama withdrawal symptoms.
As are you all, I'm sure.
The day after Spud was born, in what was the first and last conversation I had with her since his birth, the following exchange took place:
Mother: I still havent been told you know.
Me: Yes you have.
Mother: No I havent.
Me: Yes you have. N told you last night.
Mother: YOU havent told me. When N told me he'd arrived the night before I was absolutely livid.
Me: I've been in labour for 3 days and I'm exhausted. Do you really think I need this right now?
Mother (all high-and-mighty): Now listen Panda...
Me: Fuck off, mum. Just fuck off.
Really, I need someone to be pissed off with me because I didn't personally ring them the second my child was born when I've just been through some kind of emotional and physical hell and since then have been worried that said child is okay and not about to die because he got a lungfull of poo. How inconsiderate of me not to drop everything and pay attention to how my sociopath mother is feeling neglected by not being the centre of my universe.
She rang us the day we got home from the hospital, ostensibly to apologise, but Monkey Boy assures me that the words "I'm sorry I'm such a self-centred cow" did not pass her lips. Nor did the words "congratulations", "how are you?", or "how's Spudly?"
What-ev-uh.
While I was in labour my mother emailed me a letter to the effect that because I had not been a good enough daughter she had burnt all my baby pictures and movies and I was going to have to [paraphrasing] "make up my own history about my upbringing".
ReplyDeleteShe is in Australia, I am here in Vancouver and I think she was mighty pissed off I was not more in touch regarding my pregnancy and had the audacity to suggest a wonderful legacy gift for my son would be mementos of his mother as a baby.
I am not sure why some mums are like this Panda, I really don't. All I know is that when it comes to me and my son, I have a role model of what NOT to do. :-)
I'm just praying my mum doesn't behave this way when the time comes. She's being surprisingly good about the whole TTC thing, considering we would have quite happily axe-murdered each other less than a year ago!
ReplyDeleteJacqueline - I think what your mother did is abhorent. What do these women expect? I'm trying to have a kid so we can give it all our love and support and see how it grows, not so it behaves in some sort of way to bring me kudos. I have been tempted at times to ask my mother why she even got pregnant and had 3 kids. She certainly didn't seem to keen on parenting at any stage.
My mother-in-law is a nightmare so I relate to the troubles. Spudly is gorgeous.
ReplyDeleteGood God Panda, where is my comment?? Are you moderating now? Was it eaten up again? Bloody blogging hell.
ReplyDeleteWhile I was in labour my mother emailed me a letter to the effect that because I had not been a good enough daughter she had burnt all my baby pictures and movies and I was going to have to [paraphrasing] "make up my own history about my upbringing".
ReplyDeleteShe is in Australia, I am here in Vancouver and I think she was mighty pissed off I was not more in touch regarding my pregnancy and had the audacity to suggest a wonderful legacy gift for my son would be mementos of his mother as a baby.
I am not sure why some mums are like this Panda, I really don't. All I know is that when it comes to me and my son, I have a role model of what NOT to do. :-)