Monday, July 10, 2006

In Which We Battle The Mucous...Oh The Mucous

You know you love your child when you have mucous secreting itself from (almost) every orifice, your ears are plugged up with something the consistency of road tar and your throat currently contains a rock covered in sandpaper and you still dont mind being up at 4am rocking him (hopefully) back to sleep. So this is parenthood.

As it turned out, he didnt go back to sleep. The 4am screamfest turned into a 5.30am breakfast snack and we're all still awake and arent we jolly about that.

Who are these morons saps people who think that having a child will help their (usually failing) marriage? What on earth would possess someone to think that having 2 adults sick enough to want to die and a baby with a temperature and some weird-ass cough thing going on who hasnt pooed in 3 days but continues to produce the MOTHER of all stinky farts and will NOT settle down and go to sleep is a sure-fire way of bringing you closer to your significant other? Because when the shrieking starts and drills through your head and your partner has to yell to be heard over the noise...then...then running away with Jack Sparrow looks like a Really Good Idea.

7 comments:

  1. We have to yell over the top of Kira sometimes too, though generally only when she's fighting us to go to sleep. I've been known to shout so loudly I end up in a coughing fit - and my hubs still can't hear me. :\

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  2. Too right sister. Parenting when sick is the WORST THING EVER.

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  3. I'm just hoping that the really disgusting stuff will prove worthwhile later on as embarassing fodder for utilizing against her in public when later on she thinks she is way to cool to be out with the parents.

    So far my favorite is the "You Cant Do That On Television" slime I had to pull out of her infantile vagina so she could start to urinate properly - not to mention the death that has become her diapers since MR. Sweet Potato has made his dietary arrival.

    I want to make scratch and sniff postcards of her diapers to send to her when she is in college to let her know how much we really love her.

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  4. Sorry to hear that you a MK are not well. In light of your situation I too would run away with Jack Sparrow. I hope that things settle down soon and you feel better quickly.

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  5. I'd run away w a minah bird at this point but Jack Sparrow! Isn't he fascinating?? The machoest fairy ever, I love him. I'll treat myself to the film after exams, oh yes I will.

    This: "and arent we jolly about that" I found absurdly hilarious, really I did. *sigh* I hope you feel better soon, you poor things.

    [Have I told you I love the new look? Yes? No? What w exams and Blogger am absolutely lost. I do, anyway.]

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  6. I'll never understand why people think that having a child will "fix" their relationship...
    I hope that you feel better!!!

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  7. We have to yell over the top of Kira sometimes too, though generally only when she's fighting us to go to sleep. I've been known to shout so loudly I end up in a coughing fit - and my hubs still can't hear me. :\

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